Due to overwhelming demand from emotionally unavailable people, there's a slight queue.
Estimated wait: 7 lifetimes
Opening front camera, activating voice recorder, and preparing evidence slideshow. Your partner has no idea what's coming.
⚠️ Point of no return reached
Tip: Maintain eye contact for maximum emotional impact
Because managing multiple partners in a busy life shouldn't feel like a full-time job. We've got your back. And your front. And your side piece.
Track all your relationships in real-time. See who's nearby, who's en route, and who you should definitely not be texting right now. Proximity alerts keep you alive... literally.
& are both heading to Koramangala. ETA overlap in 12 min. Initiating escape protocol...
Your phone wallpaper automatically updates with the nearest partner's photo, name, and heart emojis. Walk into a room? Wallpaper changes. Leave the room? Changes back. It's like magic, but sadder.
When multiple partners are detected nearby, PMS auto-triggers a fake call from "Dad" or "Boss" to help you slip out gracefully. The AI even generates background office noise. You're welcome.
Our AI monitors your partner's activity patterns, message sentiment, and "working late" frequency to calculate a real-time Suspicion Score™. Premium users see everything. Non-premium partners see nothing. That's the power move.
On a call with one partner and another calls? PMS auto-answers using your AI-cloned voice. It knows your tone, your pet names, your "hmm" and "haan baby." You're on two dates at once without even trying.
After the breakup, PMS connects you with verified loyal humans who also just discovered their partner was trash. Nothing builds a connection like shared emotional devastation. It's like Tinder, but therapeutic.
People who've been through it, and stayed loyal. Verified by our AI.
Built by people who've been there. Engineered by people who shouldn't have been.
Set safe zones and danger zones. Get alerted if Partner A enters Partner B's territory. Territorial disputes, managed.
Auto-rotates your lock screen photo based on who's within Bluetooth range. Includes heart emojis and pet names.
AI-powered fake calls from "Dad", "Boss", or "Doctor". Complete with background noise and a 3-minute script.
Premium AI analyzes partner behavior. Phone face-down? Late nights? New gym membership? We do the math.
Another partner calls while you're busy? AI auto-answers in your voice, uses your pet names, and handles the whole conversation.
Post-breakup matchmaking with AI-verified loyal humans. Shared trauma = instant connection. It's science, probably.
This app does not exist. No partners were monitored in the making of this page. If you actually need this app, please reconsider your life choices. Happy April Fools' Day! 🎉
* "Free forever" means until we pivot to a subscription model like everyone else
But wait... do you actually want this? 👀
If you genuinely think PMS should exist (you need help), smash that thumbs up. If enough people want it, we might just build it. No promises. Okay, maybe a little promise.